Jewel & Sapphire™

Good Bye.

2010-05-27T22:12:00.000-07:00

Guess i be closing this blog for now.

Don't simply have the time to write as much as i used to. Most of the time i just share with my dear dear nia. Hehe.

Enjoyed writing all this well but then im getting tired too.

Created another blog where i only share images taken with my camera. Love it. That's a passion im going to continue with.

louis-with-fz28.blogspot.com

Good bye.

It's been a long while...

2010-05-22T00:09:00.000-07:00

Aight another long while i didn't update my blog. Don't have the time nor the heart to write as i used to. Been jobless for a while... yes i got a job in Denise the wine shop but its not a full time ler...

In the weeks to come i am going to embark on a new journey. Well cut the crap. JOURNEY. duh =_=.

Well i was resorted to two options for my choice of work. Citibank and Salmat Salesforce. No that is not a local company but an australian thats been growing since 2 decades ago.

To cut the long story, i've chosen citibank for fear of taking risks. Not to say im a coward but i couldn't take more of it and i am... well, desperate? True that what i am going to work, the pay is gonna be way low but those ppl said 3 months later u gonna get a hang of it and earn comissions up to 3.5k. I do not know that is credible or not. The company won a Hewitt best employer before... well only once. fedex and amex won a number of times tho.

bit messed up on what i am going to say ><.

I am going to work there soon and i hope things will be more than alright and better. Good things come to those who wait and there could be a blessing in disguise. no i did not say that but some friend and elders gave me those two cents.

true to a certain extent cos i have some sort of different feel when i went to the places that i have interviewed. the motivation and energy is quite different too.

its the mid of may liaw... June to come soon and i hope things would turn well...

Secret Garden at One Utama.

2010-01-09T01:50:00.000-08:00

Went to secret garden today which is opened only on weekends. Started to rain a bit later and the sun wasn't hot enough too. These are the only pics that i think are worth showing here.... rest i just put in facebook la ><

Hola ! It's a new year.

2010-01-09T01:46:00.000-08:00

Another few months of my absence from blogging. It's my offday today so i better off updating while my friends nagggggggggggggggggg me to update here. No much to wrote about as usual. Not hoping that this year would be a better year but instead i hope that i can overcome the challenges easier. Nothing in life is easy. You have to have the guts go clean the mess you have. Life's like that ^^.

You gotta be tough.

No new year resolutions. They are just lies you made up for yourself. Haha...

A bit of randomness

2009-09-09T07:39:00.000-07:00

Just some random pics. Was at Sunway hotel nights ago selling wine for charity. I thought business was good at first. turn out that we only sold 10 bottles of wine out of 100 ... But anyway, at least the environment was very well since it's a five star hotel ^^

Fish & Co.

2009-09-09T07:26:00.000-07:00

Me n my housemates went to this Fish & Co some nights ago at One U. Average meal. Had i don't know what it's called and the rest had fish and chips. Meal was decent enough and the drinks were satisfying also. It's not often we had a good meal together... ^^

How far can my camera go?

2009-09-09T07:16:00.000-07:00

I've been owning Panasonic Lumix FZ28 for quite some time now. Months perhaps? I love my camera a lot tho it's just a advanced point and shoot camera uncomparable to a DSLR. But it's a SUPERZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.

2009-09-09T07:15:00.001-07:00

t's been a long time that i didn't update my blog and write about anything. I'm just busy. depressed and totally lost my senses. I'm even beginning to felt a bit "demanding" or "singaporean" since i work for ocbc. Lots of changes took place. Some good, others bad. Late had an addiction to lemons and coconut drinks XD. No idea why. Hehe... Not been eating much as i used too. Need to lose a lot of weight in two months time or else my dear hua mu lan would slice me. Hehe...:x

Been travelling a lot too. Being a domestic tourist running here and there to have a look whts so speacial about Malaysia...

Memories obliterated.

2009-09-06T06:35:00.000-07:00

This is a part of my baby ASUS.

My laptops core. The hardisk.

What happened?

It broke down today.

when i got back from somewhere.

my baby was crying for help then. screaming painfully as it thawed my cold heart.

How could i leave you lonely there?

All was lost now.

Those memories, those images...

This is the saddest day in my life :(

tired

2009-07-22T07:31:00.000-07:00

tired . . .

sometimes i just wonder when will i get busted...

Randomness

2009-07-17T06:25:00.000-07:00

Im free tonight. and alone too. Coz everyone went back to their hometown and im here wondering tiredly. My hippo was busy tonight to layan me. lots of work. Hope she goes through it smoothly. It's a hell lot of stress and tiredness too.

My work has been fine. My trainer talked to me just now. He told me that tho i was weak, i have atitude to do work and continue. I felt proud :) but sad that no one to share that moment of relieve. Tried to call that someone since noon... but..

It's been rather long that i didn't write. In English particulary. Everyday i've been using bank terms. Kinda tired and i felt like a robot. Credit cards specialist. Singaporeans. LOL.

Have i been better or worse? God knows.

Tomorrow is my favourite day of the year. BON ODORI.

LOVEEEEEEEEEEE IT !!!!

Hope to have some fun tomorrow ! XD

Part Two, a morning in PD.

2009-06-13T22:45:00.000-07:00

breakfast there was a rip off and they dun even had fried eggs!!!!! The morning was quiet... perhaps the last time we saw each other... some but not all.. haha. Cos i still meet some of them.... wasn't unhappy or so.... maybe cos....

Well a few glimpse of the pics i took... bye bye...

Port Dickson Day One

2009-06-13T22:35:00.000-07:00

Went to PD for a class trip... tutorial to be exact.Sad that some didn't make it. Siew, Melissa, Jessica.. hey... why? Had an enjoyable night but a few of pinches in my heart too.... anyway, another memory to be kept behind my head...

The moon ~

2009-06-13T22:34:00.000-07:00

Yes this is the moon taken from my camera XD.

Buffet at One world Hotel

2009-06-13T22:21:00.000-07:00

A hearty meal at Cinnamon at one world hotel. It costs around rm90 to each of us and wowee ~ a good bargain. Enjoyed a lot there. Took helllllll lotsa pics. And i will never eat fresh oyesters anymore. Don't really understand what is so good about it. Haha.. i'd rather eat bass, cheese and those that i really enjoyed. Went to watch Wolverine after the meal. SYOK BANAR. Eh seh... not used brunei language for a long while. It' a good movie to watch. Effects are great too. Went home quite late. . .

Last Day of Class

2009-06-13T22:09:00.000-07:00

This was one month ago. Been busy and tired to upload my pics and blog some crap out of it. Well that's just it. Had a fun time at starbucks and alter ate at fireman. Time just moved so fast. SO many pains and tears i had through during my time in UTAR. I couldn't say it's the best or worst time but surely, im not really happy with my "life" there... or do i really have a life? People are so full of ego, hypocrites and so... and soo... finally im outta there. There is only a handful of memories that i have that i can treasure the rest... forgetting them slowly. I remembered how i used to be moody and sad often. Goin home is like goin to hell. Thank god that i got a part time job that lasted for 6 months to keep my mood occupied. At the same time, i matured and developed a new skill and expertise? Wine. Haha.. Thank you Denise The Wine Shop. I learned a lot there.

Now im working at Cyberjaya. Yes the pressure is more intense. More stressful. But i am able to enjoy it more better. Just go there, work, do my best and leave that day happy. Night time is my free time from now on.. except that these few week i had to study for my work but after a while, i should be fine. THo travelling home is another hell... 2 hours... fuck. but well.... that's life. Dun plan to move there tho...

and so here ends my story...

It's my bday

2009-06-03T06:52:00.000-07:00

It's my bday yesterday. A surprise that my housemates got me a cake. Touched. Before that a dear friend celebrated for me. It wasnt really a fabulous day. But i appreciated those who did things to me for my bday ^^. Bought myself an expensive present XD

Another glimpse, another thought of life...

2009-05-24T05:40:00.000-07:00

Had a hard time adjusting my life. Had to get used to it to the loneliness.

Watched a video by Leong today in his blog...learn this. If you failed 100 times, try 100 times again. Keep on trying again and don't give up. If you did, do you think you will get up again?

and another was an advice by my teacher, it's just that everything is over and i had to restart a new life... Its a new world and you gotta move on louis..

it' s Sunday

2009-05-17T01:56:00.000-07:00

It's sunday and it's my last day of the so called freedom i had cos tomorrow i be starting to work. Travel all the way to cyberjaya took about1.30 hour. Had to wake up about 5.30 every morning now to prepare n travel. Tough and tiring journey but well, they paid me well and i gotta sacrifice well too. Probably around june or july i guess financial problems would start to ease now as i can help my family :) Kinda cried when i got the job and of course, a lot of my friends who knew how much my pay was was kinda :WAH.......... top secret here. XD

Wish me luck tomorrow. Not been blogging for a month too le. Wonder would i have time to do so still.

End of one, beginning of another...

2009-04-17T05:53:00.000-07:00

Alas... my academic life ends here. Don't know if it was a happy ending or sad... 3 years just went by like this and now when you recall the past... what is it all about? I have mixed feelings tho. happy and sad. Sad cos well... can't see dear friends anymore... Happy...well to quote from someone,..cant wait to get away from those pathetic faces. True. So tempted to put their fucking names there but well.Spare them la....

Goin to have an interview next month. Hope i can get the job. Gotta brush up some of my skills too. The pain of working life is here and well, gotta struggle to it and make some things come true.

Sigh. Suddenly want to vent my anger here

**********************************************
To this two fucking guys. FUCK YOU. CURSE YOU.
No i won't pray for your death but i pray for your sufferings.
Let everyday be a mess to you. A torture. If there is a chance, i'll skin you alive. Break your bones with a hammer inch by inch and i'll pull your hair out once by one. And what pain cud it be if i'll kick your balls every few hours? and oh another form of pain, i'll stick some sharp steel under your nails and let it bleed. and oh i will pull ur nails slowly too XD. and why not let scorpions sting you around? and dogs barking you? afterball being scared is far more worse than expecting a pain. and last i shall put worms into your ears. and let u whine in pain.

All for hurting someone. This is a nightmare i hope you get every night.

and oh, i hope you will be raped.

**********************************************

i'm still working in denise now. be leaving soon with a small amount of money. Hope i will strive well next month and be the best of everything. Will i do my masters or continue studying again? i don't know. just hope things will be alright.

Choices

2009-04-14T06:03:00.000-07:00

Not been blog seriously for months and i seem to lost touch of my composure. FInally it has come to a stage where i had to make choices. By the end of this april. Life's gonna get serious and critical and imma going to step into a new phase of life. Just that i had some troubles on where to go and what to do. Earlier, everything was planned well. But somehow something else struck me and i asked myself.... are you confident? are you sure? Many things swirl into my mind and i dun even know what i can really do. It's money that bugs me a lot. Got parents and bro to take care and my own future.

I'm only 22. coming 23. most may see this as a "still young" age. but .. maybe im just too ambitious or had high expectations in my life? And i just keep asking myself that shud i go back to brunei or something. Brunei used to flourish well.. but now.. it's not as it is. A lot of things are more expensive than malaysia here too.

what do i really want? Why do i had to go through this journey alone?

A lot of my friends.. most of them will be playing around after their studies. Kinda envious cos, i dun seem to have any line to follow and play through. All im worried is money and getting a job and those kinda stuff.

What to do? I was born in this life.And i want to change my life. But i know it is going to be hard...

YAY !!!!!

2009-04-13T05:14:00.000-07:00

It began one saturday, ding dong. Some malay guy shouted my name and left a huge box outside my door. I peeked. I gasped. I panic. IT'S MY CAMERA FROM UK !!! So happy. but i was stunned a while tho. Opened the parcel and there it was Fujifilm. I was like huh???? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO She bought the wrong camera !!!!!!!!!!!!!! I sweated, cold air creeped around my neck. i opened up the box. A sense of relief came. My lumic was inside and YAYYYYYYYYYYYYY

THANKS FARAH ABDULLAH XD XD

And here is a pic i took playing with the focusing. XD

I'm just

2009-03-26T05:42:00.000-07:00

Unhappy today

Angry today

Pissed off.

No one is around for me today. Felt....

Headache still here.

Hand in assignment le but still worried bout some other assignments still $ of them.

Angry with this debu-bitch.Thinking that animal is so geng. Only know how to bully bully bully.

Why didn't i fight back? Voice back?

Guilty.

How can i bear more? Today when talking i can even felt the sharpness in my voice.

Evenhough im dead tired and busy, i still cared. But i didn't even get a sms :( sad.

headache. But i still stay put. Don't care. Just let the pain go bombom in me.

Had a lousy meal. Looked at my tummy. go die la.

Might go hunger strike for a week plus or so.

Depression. Thinking too much.

Why do i always end up with rubbish?

Had a bad day. got honked again. Almost went straight face to face with a vehicle. I lost my senses a lot. . .

Mum, dad. Miss you. T_T

Brunei, i wish i could go back but den again, its not goin to be a place that i may be happy with. The bad memories. I'll go back there one day. Work. Earn. Back to Msia again.

Going to graduate soon. Happy and yet sad.

A sad love story...

2009-03-15T09:55:00.000-07:00

Girl:Slow down, i'm scared.
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No it's not. Please it's too scary!
Guy: Ten tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, i love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.
Girl:*hugs him*
Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on yourself? It's bugging me
Girl: Alright, now slow down
Guy: i love you babe..
Girl: i love you too.noe please slow down. pleaseeee

(in the paper next day)

A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of a brake failure. two people were on it and only one survived.

The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes broke.But he did not want to ler the girl know. instead he had her say she loved him and felt her hug one last time., then he had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it meant tht he would die...

I got this from my godsis. cant copy n paste from her blog so i had to type it all. JOREEN !. Hehe. it's a sad story . . . touching. How many would sacrifice so much for someone they love? i know i would. the one i loved know i would. She call me 'silly' and "little piggy" often. Loved her a lot too. I know that i might not be together with her. But i still wish it would happen. Love, true love. it's so hard to earn. I would sacrifice for her. Even if she did not want too, i would still love her, take care of her, her parents even they are never my in laws or so... to what extent can u take ur love to lengths? Mine, i cant measure it. God knows. I went to so much text. I went to so many pains n troubles. and im still standing strong. and wait... :)

Returning

2009-02-21T07:14:00.000-08:00

><

It's been almost a month since i last blog. Been very busy with lots of things. Academics and work.It had also been an emotional month for me tho. To begin with, lets start with my Uni. Well it's been tough since i've been stuck with people that i can't communicate or cooperate with. It's really awful and hard and emotions just stirred up. Been trying hard to make things better but it justs get harder. Talk here and talk there and in the end everything just pushes back to me. My stresses level peaked to the certain extent that im restless and pimples grew too. Been trying hard, been pressured. Graduation is coming soon and what can i do? Will i get a good job soon or will i be in deep trouble? i Have options tho i being going to kampar and be a tutor, IF they are willing to hire me. Second i will be going back to Brunei and teach. Which will i choose? Hopefully, i would get to work in the Brunei government. Then i will be super happy and richer by 2 years compared to if i were working in Malaysia XD. But then, it was just perhaps a wish that may be far reached. Nevertheless i may be in trouble again. Well least i still get to work temporarily in Denise for the time being.

Work? Aight. Lots to lose. Every month i would be losing money. Why? Cos its either those wines get missing or i break em. T_T

My emotions are swinging lately. My temper is getting awful.But i need to keep it behind me, behind my heart and held those pains that are stabbing at me. You know how it feels? Sometimes you just felt like your a "criminal" while ur not. Imagine been accused of murder or something and there your waiting your turn at the deathrow. Stress and you sure know that you're not gonna die but the stress is just still there. How long should i wait?3 months?

CURSE YOU. Woman.Is there shit in your brains?

Still, the accident i had last month haunts me.just everytime i walk past that road, it reminded me of that accident. Just everytime a car honks me, a motor zooms by, it haunts me. and with accidents i see, with ppl die,it haunts me more. I wish i could move and not see the road again, cos its still haunting me at times....

15th Jan. Life. Fragile isn't it? Accident.

2009-01-15T17:18:00.000-08:00

Just yesterday morning. Around 7.45 am around my condo. I had an accident. Can't remember anything that happened except waking up semi-consciously on the road. Mei Ling just happened to be there when she saw me. Said i was lying in the middle of the road and the bicycle was somewhere and people were dragging me to the pavement. Then i guess i must have woke up then. Cos i was tryin to take out my phone and call my parents. I was closing my eye. and bloody hell then i realize i didn't have any credit. Mei Ling called from the otherside of the road then i was lucky she was somehow there.A lot of things i cant remember then. Like she was there helping me up and it was me locking the bicycle to the chain instead of her. I tot it was her doing it.

Well i think after chainin the bicycle i was sent ot UM Hospital Trauma and Emergency Center.Had a two jabs. Arm and my Butt. Ouch. I was lucky that my balls are still intact having to ride on a bicycle.

Spent two hours in agony at the ward. Keep holding my head. Had a big swell on my head and a lot of tissue torn. arms and legs. Ouch. Even walking is a pain now.

Was discharged around 2 pm. Still went to uni to show em im alright :) was happy that a lot cared for me :) :) :)

Woke up with more pains in the upper part body.

I'm alive now. Glad and relieved. A bit guilty too. Thank God im here again. Its a very traumatic and scary experience. But i got through it and stayed strong.

Amuleto by Crystal Jade

2009-01-03T06:24:00.000-08:00

Went to Amuleto by Crystal Jade Last month bring my darling for lunch :) Had a great time there. Food was great but just a bit oily. Supposedly we are to try that chocolate fountain but HELL SUMTHING WENT WRONG WITH THE MACHINE AND IT WASN'T SERVED THAT DAY.

Bad Luck.

But still we had a lovely lunch :).

Shopping !!!

2009-01-03T06:12:00.000-08:00

Went shopping around Sg Wang, Times Square and Midvalley today. Had a healthy lunch at Ah Yee herbal restaurant. A bit pricy but its delicious tho. Got two Giordano T.A scarf and a shoe. Spend like almost rm200. First time i spend with my hard earned money.

DAMN HAPPY TODAY. HAPPY! HAPPY! HAPPY!

LA LA LA LA !!!

Oh i love my scarf and Giordano.

HAPPY !!!!!!

Ate a lot today too. This Tiramisu Ice blend from little taiwan. NOT GOOD AT ALL!

Then em... thinks that's all. XD

Night now :)

So it begins. . . 2009

2008-12-31T08:23:00.000-08:00

And here i am. 2009. 2008 just creeped away minutes ago.

Lots to catch up. Last year had been a better year. Tho some problems still arise. However, im optimistic that this year will be better too :) Lots to adjust and change. Most importantly, achieve.

Celebrating it alone like last year. It wasn't much except that i bought myself some food and watched fireworks.

New Year Resolutions...

Em... Still the same i guess. But i had more materialistic goal this year :) Perhaps it's time. 6 months to go, i do hope . . . the very best will come :).

Tagged

2008-12-29T07:32:00.000-08:00

Starting time : Timeless

Name : Louis Wong Jau Yn
Sisters : 0
Brothers : 2
Shoe size : Er... ><
Height : 180 cm

Have you ever been on a plane : yes
Swam in the ocean : Can't swim well
Fallen asleep at school : Yea....
Broken someone’s heart : :( Yes...
Fell off your chair : yes

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : yes
Saved e-mails : Deleted a lot
What is your room like : Mess
What's right beside you: a cup of bovril and... a book. Warcraft Archives XD
What is the last thing you ate : Biscuits

Ever had... Chicken pox : yes
Sore throat : Right now
Broken nose : no
Do you Believe in love at first sight : No.
Like picnics : yes....

Who was/were... The last person you danced with : A lady in my dreams :)
Last made you smile : When Melissa Poh tagged me
You last yelled at : I yell too much

Today did you... Talk to someone you like : yes
Kissed anyone : I wish

Get sick : yes
Talk to an ex : yes
Miss someone : yes

Who do you really hate: The Bully, The Smiling Bitch, The Backstabber Slut, The Illogic Whore. NSFL
Do you like your hand-writing : Hate it
Are your toe nails painted : no
Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in : hers... :x
What color shirt are you wearing now : I'm naked

Are you a friendly person : I think so....
Do you have any pets : One lost, the other died :'(
Do you sleep with the TV on : Never
What are you doing right now : answering your questions...
Can you handle the truth : Yes, I'd prefer the truth

Are you closer to your mother or father : Mom
Do you eat healthy : I want to.....
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : yea
If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : Yu Hua
Are you loud or quiet most of the time : depends on company....
Are you confident : depends on what I'm doing....

5 things I was doing 10 years ago
1) Same as Mel. Dancing for SEA GAMES !!!
2) Went to SMMG and had... a horrible and tough life onwards
3) NO Life
4) NO good memories
5) Full of....

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1) Get married with her....
2) Bring my family and her's to travel together
3) Charity
4) Learn all sorts of art. Play Piano, Cook...
5) Do all the above things

5 of my bad habits
1) Ahem
2) Shop when i got money too
3) Can't take care of myself well
4) Not really organized as i am b4
5) impatient

5 places I am living in
1) my room
2) my living room
3) my toilet
4) my store room
5) my kitchen

5 people I tag
let's see if the fellow Utarians for tags....

Lazy to tag la.. wanna sleep liaw ><

Things to get for 2009. A New Year.

2008-12-27T19:19:00.000-08:00

It's gonna be 2009 in a matter of days. Been neglecting my blog for an awful period of time. There's a lot that i've not post up yet. >< Well here's my wishlist or things that imma need to get next year.

YES A NINTENDO DS. Been wanting to have it for a pretty long time. Since i'm working part time now with a decent pay... and saving aggresively and organizing my money ( FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE) properly. I'd get this GODLIKE artifact around Feb. I hope unless some unforseen circumstances stabbed me from the back and i had to delayed it. T_T Not decided what colour to get yet. Any suggestions? I thinking about White, Enamal Blue, Green, Cobalt blur or Red. VOTE !!!

YES A PANASONIC LUMIX PROSUMER!!! And it bloody costs RM 1.4K at the moment. Will only get this by the end of 2009. So expensive la... price should be dropping then and i'll get this as a christmas gift for myself. One year to go, One year to save.

That's the only two item that i'll get for myself. Nothing else i need unless my laptop got divorced me. Need her a lot and i don't really need a new once.

Other stuff that i may need to get...

Socks. yeah. Socks. Most of those i'm wearing now got holes. Thinking of getting those coloured socks.

Shoes. Two pairs. A black leather one and a sporty one. My current shoe got a hole there and the other white one, sort of got a tear at the sides. May get the leather one when imma grad.

Sling bag. White Converse that i saw in Midvalley or the $$$ ones by Bagman. Good for my laptop and it's rainproof.

Umbrella. God know. She knows. I need one. I lost a new one not long ago. There's a bloody good auto umbrella by Denise tho. It costs RM 47!!!!!> Boss, can i get a discount?

FOSSIL watch or some watch. My Beverly Hills is in Brunei. Spoiled. My dad's Christa Carol Paris watch... I'll be dead when he found out what happened to his watch.

Jeans. Im getting bigger each month. Trying to slim down but there isnt much improvement.

Vest. Clothes. Gonna get some to shape myself out.

Fish Foot Spa. My feet... smells cos i got lostsa dead skin there. Even cutting my nails is a pain.

Thermoflast. Hot soup at nite when imma at work.

Emm Emm. Guess that's it? Well i do have wishes and some resolutions. But that will remain a secret ^^

Randomness

2008-12-01T07:56:00.000-08:00

Had fun with these people. And well.. most probably the most "fun" thing was where i had my hair cut by Koon, Li Zhao and De you.... Oh bloody De you you're liar. I caught your bloody liar and guilty face on Cam. Wait till i snap it and post it on blog.

Loong Kitchen

2008-12-01T07:52:00.000-08:00

Yes.YES. YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!

I had a food orgasm. IT"S MY FAVOURITE DISH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Steamed Yam and Pork Rice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOVE IT !!!!!!!!!!!

But too bad i can't have it for dinner now cos my night shift is in Unique Seafood. :( But im waiting to get my pay and apply an offday to attack it NEXT WEEK !!!

My wine adventures...

2008-12-01T07:47:00.000-08:00

My Wine adventures. . .
Before i had my interview at Denise, i actually interviewed for a job in the Garden's beside Midvalley as a retail assistant for an artshop. The pay was good and it's someplace i enjoyed to be in. Sadly i didn't get it and then happily i didn't cos my dar;ing told me it was really inconvenient. My second interview was with Denise the Wine shop in SS2. It was like a heaven sent job. I passed by the shop and there was vacancy for a WINE ADVISER and it needn't any EXPERIENCE. SO i went in, had my interview and few hours later i was HIRED. Very thankful for the job. My had starting pay with RM5 per hour and now RM6.^^

Has my first training at Hotel Equatorial KL. Training as a Someliar.(Did i get that spelling right?) Well i had 4 glasses of white wines, 3 glasses of red and a whisky from scotland which is a decade plus old) The experience was high-class and i never thought that i had the privilege to be inside a ballroom to drink those super expensive wines. Somemoew everyone was wearing formal while i only had my uniform.

Don't know when was my next training would be but i had drank a number of variety by now. Ausssie wine, Frenh, argentinan and chilian wine. And i had inputed a lot of wine knowledge in me. My favourite wine would now be Pertaringa Moscato. A white wine which is easy to drink. I don't really like red wines tho. Most are harsh with a level of tannin. Whites are better :)

Now im a sort of "manager" in charge of a small outlet. probably the size of my kitchen in Unique Seafood restaurant. Lovely place and it feels good to work independently here. No need to face stares by my co workers where it feels a bit weird and thus stopping my selling skills. I perform well better here.

There are indeed pains in this industry. One of it is having "jiu mo" or alllergic to certain substances in the wine. I had a bloody itch now for three days and i usually get heavy red patches if i drink a large amount of wine. 4 days ago i had 4 glasses of Shiraz and the second day a few glasses of Cab Sau.Now my itch is still killing me.

I also have broken a bottle of wine that costs me rm94.30 and it sure is a pain if i broke another bottle. Imagine i broke a RM 500 plus plus wine. God have mercy on me T_T. It's a pain too since i was shifted to Unique Seafood. Cycling there to work and back home late at night. It was tiring and i actually kinda broke down on my first night travelling a freaking 45 minutes home.

Work was tough indeed and it certainly had a strong impact on my character. I must say that my mind was shapped differently now and that i've become more mature and different. Maybe no one judges how one should think of oneself. But this is how i've felt due to some thoughts that had lingered in my mind.

Payday is coming next week when lady boss is back from thai.Gonna solve my problem real soon. Parents not sending me any money for my living expenses now too so it's all up to me now.

I had this vision , a dream that i want to be with with this person. Good changes are stepping into me one by one and i just hope that person can see the possibility and happiness in what i see. it''s been awfully a painful journey that i went through. God knows how much agony i took to reach this level. I wish for a blessing. No i want a blessing. . .i really need her a lot. I love her a lot. and i damn care and love her a lot more than anyone in this world.

Cigars
David, my district manager gave me a stick of cigar today. Value of rm7 per stick. XD

One Noodle

2008-12-01T07:44:00.000-08:00

Arigato Li Li ! for treating me a lovely dinner at One Noodle SS2. I do enjoy there a lot and it was my first time there. I forgot what is the name of the noodle i ate and the drink but it was fabulous.They have super big bowls and "meaty" noodles. The drinks are decent and best of all... THE CHILLIES!!!! Yes i know i can't eat a lot due to my health but it's been a long time i divorced Chillies and now i want to remarry them. Haha. But i guess i wont be eating any other chillies other than the one in One noodle and certain chicken rice chillies. Haha. Also had a bite of Li Li's tong shui. Ginger tong yuan? Can't remember but it's a sweet and spicy taste of ginger that kinda ooch me >< A place i will go again, but for the sake of the chillies ! Thanks again Lim Li Li. ^^ Not posting my own pic here cos i looked fat ><

Rawrrrr / A part of Muar beach.

2008-12-01T07:32:00.000-08:00

It's a month now since i last blogged and i seem to have lost the feel to blog ><. Well been very busy since i left the blogosphere for a month and now im back writing about what had happened all this while. Supposedly my following blog should be posting photos where i went to a beach in Muar. Guess Li Li's been waiting for me to update n leave comments bout her hometown. Guess i had to start from where i have last left it. Well here's some pics i've taken in muar beach. Yea i know the photo is awful n yea i kno wmy mobile phone sucks but what can u expect right? It was a joyful memory that i cab't forget. Sitting on the "breaker" there and feeling the wind slapping your face. ... haha. It was peaceful and full of feel esp when you watch the sun sets. Wishing that someone i love was there... Maybe that's the last day i could remember in Muar. I think we went to oasis bay at night. It was quite far tho and they serve good food. I really do thank my Muar housemates for their services when we're there. A journey maybe worth remembering and also worth visiting again in the future.

( in fact this post was written days ago and i don't have the time to post it up >< )

Day Three: Morning adn the day after

2008-11-01T00:42:00.000-07:00

We spent our morning having a big breakfast.Bah Kut Teh. It wasn't really delicious as said by YTY. The worst as he said so. After that we went to pla bowling and the whole building. Completely isolated.No one except us. Spend almost the whole day there and later we went to the beach.:)

Bah Kut Teh ain't good but it fills our tummy well. Cheap too

Day two: Night at Little Cafe

2008-11-01T00:33:00.000-07:00

I think this was the last stop of Day two. There wasn't much to do. Eat, chat n catch up with our Moonlight Resonance. The environment was nice. But costly!!!

Day two: Noon In Malacca

2008-11-01T00:17:00.000-07:00

Yeap.We went to Malacca after our breakast.I do enoy myself a lot in Malacca and i will again go there. One day ^^. Food was great. Old buildings are awesome. I feel very happy when i was there. Bought a top too. Gasing not the top that ladies wear mind you.:P

James Blunt - Goodbye my lover

2008-10-16T20:43:00.000-07:00

"Goodbye My Lover"

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

**************************************

:(

My favourite currently.

Cher

2008-10-16T20:42:00.001-07:00

"Believe"

After love, after love [repeat]
No matter how hard I try
You keep pushing me aside
And I can't break through
There's no talking to you
So sad that you're leaving
Takes time to believe it
But after all is said and done
You're going to be the lonely one, Ohh Oh

[CHORUS:]
Do you believe in life after love
I can feel something inside me say
I really don't think you're strong enough,
Now
Do you believe in life after love
I can feel something inside me say
I really don't think you're strong enough,
Now

What am I supposed to do
Sit around and wait for you
And I can't do that
There's no turning back
I need time to move on
I need love to feel strong
'Cause I've had time to think it through
And maybe I'm too good for you Ohh Oh

[CHORUS]

But I know that I'll get through this
'Cause I know that I am strong
I don't need you anymore
Oh I don't need you anymore I don't need you anymore
No I don't need you anymore

[CHORUS repeat to fade]

This is one dance song i enjoyed for some period of time

Day two: morning in muar

2008-09-29T08:31:00.000-07:00

Waking up reluctantly in the morning. And again that bitch jumped on me. Had our breakfast at the town in a street called "tan chi jie" translated literally "greedy eater" We had wanton mee which is delicious compared to any that i tasted in Pj and we also felt deceived with the "bird nest" drink. tastes more like luo han guo. but 70 cents nia wor... what do you expect? After the fulfilling breakfast we went to Tanjong playing monkeys. Nah, just observing them. Its another part of tanjung tho.quite deserted. when we feed the monkeys, a whole lot came later and it reminded me of the scene form the classic "the omen". Ouch. And off we go to out next destination. Malacca !!!

Wanton mee: 80/100
Bird nest: 75/200. Tho deceived but the price bought me.
Monkeys: 60/100 nothing much there tho.

Muar Night one

2008-09-29T07:06:00.000-07:00

Arrived quite late in Muar that saturday due to the old junkie slow car my driving.Hehe.We're slow by an hour i guess but well it's better than no car at all.>< Our first stop was Kia Huey's house and we gonna spend our nights there. It was decent but there's a bitch there that got attracted to me. Yes. A bitch named Lulu. Small and her smell sorta makes me sneeze. Maybe i got allergic. Our first eat out was at a very distant place. Had seafood and it sure is very cheap.Then we went to this place called Tanjung where a lot of couples went there and nutcases. There a lousy pasar malam too operated mostly by the malays. Nothing much to eat except clothes and more clothes. Scenery was okay but i like the river view. The only thing it lacks is lights. Well can't expect much from a small town.

Marks for the food: 78/100
Marks for the scenery: 40/100. It's boring.

I also realized that i didn't bring my towel that night T_T boohoo

Where are we going?

2008-09-25T09:31:00.000-07:00

Yeap.A lot to blog about it but no at this nite.Tired and sleepy. ><

Introducing Li Zhao

2008-09-25T09:17:00.000-07:00

Yeap. Introducing Li Zhao this time. Over these years this lady never failed to make me smile and i respect and adore her fully as a "ta jie" Latest pics taken at Kayu in Chow Yang where she treated me Banana Lassy or yogurt drink. Love the sourish flavour. I wanna thank her for all the smiles she gave me and some words she said that touched me last year on her birthday when i was in my most depressed periods. "wo de shen ri shi yao zhu Louis ke yi tian tian the kai xin". Translated: My birthday wish is too wish Louis to be happy everyday. Well i know thats not her true birthday wish but as those extras but i appreciate it a lot. ^^

Lalala

2008-09-25T09:11:00.000-07:00

Took these pics when im loitering around One U. and thanks to Su Lin for the donuts.XD

DREAMZ

2008-09-13T06:07:00.000-07:00

this was a trip in Genting watching DREAMZ sometime ago together with Cindy, Mei Ling, CC and me. I had a great time there except the night where i had to suffer a severe headache that i can't even walk properly. No pictures of Dreamz cos we're not allowed to take so. It was just a some kinda magic show with semi naked women dancing around and albino tiger n lion. Lucky us that we got the very front seat and also incase the tiger went amok... we might be the first victim. Imagine "Utar students bitten by white tiger". touch wood. tht was ages ago then. I had a chance to perform in front too. Its where four guys seat one each other laps n den thy take off the chairs. den cc got invited by one of the clown to dance n cindy almost got kissed by some italiano. haha. din get much sleep that night. was painfully nappin at starbucks too. To round off, i gotta thank Cindy a lot for inviting me up.

funny vids !

2008-08-31T08:00:00.000-07:00

Shulin's bday

2008-08-20T04:25:00.000-07:00

It's Shu Lin's bday again. This time she treat all of us a lavish and fulfilling dinnfer. Korean BBQ and steamboat which is F R E A K I N G expensive. The food was great with constant refills. RAWR. First time i've eating such an expensive meal for the past one year. Most i had was Kim Gary which costs bout 20 plus a meal in sunway. Well gotta thank Shu Lin for the meal. Bbq-ed beef from US and some pork, chicken and lamb. The steamboat was good too and those side meals as well. Desert was some ice blended barly that "looked" so $$$$$. XD

2008-08-20T04:23:00.000-07:00

Missing you every moment, never forgetting you.
Sigh . . . Love. Why so difficult?

To my great uncle, Hasim

2008-08-16T06:09:00.000-07:00

My great uncle,
My sporting uncle,
Always there to smile,
To make us laugh,
you may be gone,
But ur memories live one...

Who am i?

2008-08-15T07:18:00.000-07:00

For 23,53 % you are: Personality B
IN LAMENS TERMS
Your Personality name is “ The Cheese Hybrid” a kind of “The Multifarious Observer”

Your genius level: (Based on a scale of 1-10) you scored: 8.6-9.6 (semi-genius)

Your personality brief: Like the nursery rhyme; “The cheese stands alone” describes your work ethic; you are a loner born and bred. You work best when alone. Very independent and idealistic. Your personality is very distinctive, original and unique. You are extremely creative and intellectual. Thorough, expressive, and contemplative at times. You often enjoy indulging in time to think things through rather than do things rashly. Scientific mindset. Optimistic in means of survival yet cynical in times of doubt. You appreciate deep music and art. You can be sarcastic and have an over-active personality, which is a very good attribute. Kindness and sincerity reflects you in every aspect. You are very sensitive, compassionate, romantic and value love Very attentive and observant of surroundings and tend to mock reactions when uncertain of behavior.

Good side of your personality: You are a very good listener and people look to you for your input and advice. You can interpret things in a way that is acknowledged as valuable and people respect and admire your intelligence in matters.

Bad side of your personality: You can come across as arrogant and stubborn sometimes. You can be very cold when angry. Tend to second guess yourself. People take advantage of your kindness. Also you can come across as undeceive and unsure.

Career calling: Pursue a career in something that will reveal your abilities in processing information, listening skills, creativeness, and intellectual self like becoming a writer, artist, psychologist, counselor, executive, business or design professional, lawyer, interior design, or wedding planner. If those are not your callings, try seeking a profession that will assist mankind for the greater good. The world needs you.

Relationships: You are the model romantic. You give your all in relationships but tend to harbor your true feelings when in doubt. Don’t hold back! Your passion for love and life is immense and sometimes is unappreciated by your choice in partners in the past. Your relationships are usually long lasting and loyal in being with someone you least expected rather than the ideal candidate in your eyes. Your relationships are at its best when first developed as good friends with strong compatibility in the same interests. Although love at first sight can be what you always wanted in your eyes, it can also be deceiving. You are extremely sexual when discovered and your partner likes this about you. Beware that your partner is more focused on your sexual talents rather than your talents at heart. Growth of a relationship means exploring each other in all aspects more than just psychical attraction or the enjoyment of ones company. Being in-tune with oneself means you are easily in-tune with your partner’s feelings. Don’t isolate yourself into a relationship you know isn’t working. If you gave your all, you gave your all. Don’t hinder your romantic heights to love someone who does not deliver love back. Only settle for the best (you are worth it). Sturdy relationships lie in the east with a creative and deep Virgo, swift Libra, fun and interesting Aquarius, and passionate Capricorns. Beware of the dominant Leos, the deceiving Sagittarius and the persuasive Cancer.

Future at a glance: You have a very prosperous, fun future in the stars wake IF you allow it to be. Be weary…a decision coming up VERY soon might decide your fate and happiness later on in life. Don’t act upon it with initial reaction. Take time to think things through. Don’t wear black this coming Friday. To solve a problem you are facing now, consult drinking lemon juice mixed with salt, sugar, and hot water. Very soon you are in store for a surprise. And last, you recently developed a bad habit and could hinder how people could perceive you as.

Advice: Stay the way you are. Let go of things you can’t change, build the perseverance to change the things you can, and acknowledge the wisdom you possess to know the difference.

*************************************************************

That's me.

Uncle Hasim Yek : RIP

2008-08-14T05:13:00.000-07:00

Today a shocking news came to me. My young uncle, younger than me by a few years. Died in a car accident in sarawak. Think that the hand gear rupture into his heart and died.

Can't believed it. Everytime i see in news about people dying in car accidents. Now it occured to someone close to me :( It's a hard to express feeling.

Don't know what to do. Except being sad. Passed away at 3 pm. I smsed him at 6pm. I knew he couldn't read it anymore. But its the only way i can communicate with him. Told him Why? and i miss him and love him.

This are the words he put in his friendster...

Without struggle, there can be no success. Love is very important to you but then again, so is your whole life.

You want what's best for you. You valve strength gained through experience

Can't help but shed tears for him. his a funny and good person.I last saw him a year ago in miri. Now. never will i see him again. Mom cried. Relatives. Everyone.

What to do?

Rest In Peace. Uncle.

untitled

2008-08-04T02:38:00.001-07:00

Juz had my presentation today. It was average with a lack of demo tho. Can't believe that my hands is shaking when i try to insert the paper inside. T_T. My show got a hole and water just seep into it. Sigh. Why? Hate to waste money on shoes le.

cant blog muchbout my inner feelings here... guess i need to move in to my secret blog to let out.

sigh

2008-08-03T03:17:00.000-07:00

it was a restless day to me today. So quiet and lonely. not knowing what is wrong with me. It's a painful and suffering moment for me for hours. Maybe i knew the fault but somehow i seem to neglect or not admit it. why? I need some rest. thats all i know. sigh.

Japanese Language Festival @ UM

2008-08-03T00:46:00.000-07:00

It's a two day festival in UM. I had a great time and moment there with some fellow classmates. First day was fun where there was some good performance and we watched Waterboys. Good movie. skipped the lessons tho and went home. hehe. Second day i played go and learned the japanese flower arrangement. :) Got the smallest roses there tho. It was a great experience for me there.

Introducing Woan Ling

2008-07-30T04:38:00.000-07:00

This is also a good friend of mine that i appreciate. I know her by accident sometime ago which is quite funny but i was proud to know her too. It was when i am in my terrible moments that this friend came to help and just talked and shared a lot. A funny person and chattable too. Now in Training, i wish you luck Ling Ling. XD

Today.

2008-07-24T07:33:00.000-07:00

Not really a good day. Barizah smsed me today. Happy that someone remembers me :D

Just chatted with some friends in Brunei bout $$. Somehow the pay is getting higher. I wonder if its inflation...

Miss someone tonight...

cross stitching...

2008-07-22T05:51:00.000-07:00

Now who say men cant cross stitch? i just finished mine :D

lalala

2008-07-22T01:52:00.000-07:00

Its been a while i didn't blog bout my feelings and stuffs. A lot happened lately of course.Ups and downs and sudden twists. Academics been itchy as usual. Didn't actually know how well have i done but i gotta work hard on it (fingers crossed). My table is still a mess as usual. Haha. What to do? What to do? Go clean up!!!

Not long ago i broke down again upon touching some sensitive things in my life. Why do you always have to cry? So much pain n the blood just can't stop bleeding. It never stops but drys up as a scab until i fall again. Thank God a dear friend is always there to "cocoon" me up so i will calm down and feel really really safe and better. World isn't really a good place :(

Well ever wonder how people that appear to be innocent and angelic is actually someone else if u look inside? How queer life is. A lot of these people actually swims around us and they don't really harm anyone. It's just ???? when we found out whats underneath. Not a crocodile under a calm river but perhaps a destroyed beautiful coral reefs under a calm beautiful crystalike shore?

Went jusco few nights ago with my housemate. Window shop at 10 pm where shops are closing n cam whoring. Kidnapped elmo for Chivalry Amulet and had a bite at those jap rice. UEK. no wonder 40 percent discount. Not delicious.

Hell i dunno how we end up somewhere far far about 30 minutes away from Midvalley just to drink some tea. =_= I do regret going out with you Mr Yan.

Oh i wonder how things will be. Its getting tougher everyday and i am becoming weaker every moment. My mood is a swing and hell someday i gonna blow up and perhaps make ppl so pissed of me.

ANGRY

SAD

HURT

MEAN

I don't have nothing much to lose. I somehow lost a lot... what's more a few more pains???

This noon 3 plus and i was in slumber again... hurtful thoughts hunt me again and well... why why why? An awful nightmare about my family again this morning. Sigh.

Bon Odori

2008-07-22T01:23:00.000-07:00

Finally got the time to edit my pics and blog about Bon Odori. I've been waiting for this event since last year and Wowee im here again for the second and probably the last time? This time i bring Li Zhao, Koon and De You with me. Better than last year where i was alone. This year however... i too wish that "that someone" was with me. Anyhow i do appreciate my friends who accompanied me there. It was heaty there as usual and my neck... turn here and there until wanna drop ady. haha. Went home after the end of the second dance and we had a late supper at Murni. Good laugh there and i do enjoy tht night. tho i end up with a bit of headache >< Thats the end of my happy night. Don't know when i will have another happy time. Didnt expect much tho i wish... there is...

heaven and earth in my heart

2008-07-21T08:50:00.000-07:00

i been looking for this mp3 for ages! and i still cant find it!

snowy peanuts?

2008-07-16T03:05:00.000-07:00

I forgot whats the name of this dessert but i have been waiting to eat this for a long time. finally had my bite. It was ok but just a little bit expensive lo. The icy snow was very soft unlike ice kacang. Went to Bon Odori and with rm5 u can eat a better ice cream. T_T n more fulfilling than this one.

Murni

2008-07-16T02:33:00.000-07:00

One of my few trips to Murni with my housemates. They are the cheese nan and roti beckham and i had the so called dragon pizza lor. It was huge and hideous in some sense. the Fillings got the pizza feel but after a few bites it didnt turn out to be delicious after all. Wont ate it the second time lu ~

"Tag" dalam Bahasa Melayu

2008-07-12T21:40:00.000-07:00

Tidak tahu mengapa saya di tag only Geok Yi. Saya pun lama dah tidak mengguna bahasa melayu. Ejaan pun tidak tahu betul atau tidak. Leceh betul la. Tetapi tak ada "choice" la so i take cuba yang terbaik saja.

7 fakta tentang saya:
o1. Semakin menjadi gemuk kerana mengalami banyak stress emosi.
o2. Suka memasak tetapi tak ada standard
o3. Cuma dengar orang puja saya comel atau "cute" dan tidak pernah handsome.
o4. sangat miskin. banyak masalah T_T
o5. Selalu sakit perut. Mungkin saya punya perut tidak kuat.
o6. Sangat handal ... erm.. kira okla dalam "handicraft"
o7. Selalu "think deep"

7 perkara menakutkan saya:
o1. Mimpi yang tidak bagus
o2. bersendirian seumur hidup
o3. Orang yang saya cintai tidak ??????
o4. tak ada duit, tak ada harapan
o5. ANJING
o6. tandas yang kotor
o7. "drowning"

7 lagu buat sekarang: (saya tidak tahu...saya tidak "update")
tak tahu la

7 perkara yang selalu disebutkan:
1. Makanan
2. Duit
3. Masalah saya
4. akademik
tak tahu juga la

7 perkara yang amat bernilai:
o1. keluarga
o2. orang kesayangan
o3. DUIT
o4. telefon bimbit
o5. kawan
o6. makanan
o7. Laptop

7 "pertama kali" dalam hidup saya:
o1. Datang ke KL untuk belajar seorang
o2. mencintai seorang perempuan sampai gila.haha
o3. Berjalan dari Midvalley hingga satu tokong yang tinggi.memang gila tau
o4. Menghadapi banyak masalah di KL, emosi, kawan...
o5. memasak untuk sendiri
o6. membuat 'handicraft'
07. sangat serious terhadap hal masa depan

7 orang bertuah (JAWAB TAG INI BALIK)

Malas la tag. Nanti kena complain. ><

Wednesday

2008-07-09T03:16:00.000-07:00

How are things lately? I think theres tension among the atmosphere lately. Was angry today. Guilty as well for my fault. Sigh. I just read a comic strip of China earthquake victims. It was sad. I was moved to tears by the things people do. Some fought till the last of their breath. Others sacrifice their live to save another. One protected her baby with her body and another woke up from the death. I was sad and happy that the things that are happening. Maybe some may think the stories are generated to make money and donation but its very genuine you see.

After reading the strips. Well it touched my heart and made me realize some things in life. Really do wish i could go there to help those people tho.

Theres a snapshot of Evelyn snatching my laptop and playing counterstrike. 50 kills in barely half an hour!!! and there was koon with her solero ice cream and me with my smarties. XD

Zzzz

2008-07-07T08:23:00.000-07:00

Can't sleep. might as well blog it out since that someone wasnt around for me :(
I don't know whats in it for me today. I just felt terrible and horrible. Maybe its just not my day? I don't know. Somehow today i just know things... well days ago i knew somethings which is kinda hurtful. It wasnt any of my problem but then its a friend and i do care a lot. Today adds another news which i heard. Kinda hurt that it happened to my friends that i really care a lot. Why? Why? Why? Why does it happens? I wish i can do something to mend it.

I don't understand why it happened. Am i suppose to understand it? Lately the days don't feel right. Even i can felt it. Over sensitivity? I don't know. It sucks and i beginning to feel the pain. Don't even know where went wrong? Academics? Family? It was stressful indeed.

Assume that this happens or if it was just my sensitivity. If im wrong, im wrong. . . Erm... dunno how to put it in words. Kinda difficult but isn't it that if you tend to avoid things it tends to go wrong? Things were okay but fear eventually make things wrong. Somehow doing either things make things wrong. It's just that more ppl get hurt.

I don't know what i see or hear but hell i wish i can shut off and leave a peacefull life. . .

Why do i have to know things last? It sucks when... no it HURTS when "eh, you dunno meh? " and "eh. i tot you know"

WHY WHY AM I IN THIS MISERABLE STATE???

EVERYDAY IS A TORTURE. T_T

I did try to be open... i tried everything...

Unhappy monday?

2008-07-07T06:45:00.000-07:00

I wasnt really okay today. Woke up with a restless heart. Carries on till i was so super happy that i found my pendrive after a month. XD In one of my shirt and i think it went into the washing machine. glad it was still okay. the rest of the day is more painful with unknown reasons....

Restless Sunday

2008-07-06T07:14:00.000-07:00

I'm very restless today. SInce i woke up till i jump into the swimming pool in the afternoon. DOne only one thing today. Cleaned my room and removed my bed stand. From now on i be sleeping on the floor lo ~

Envy ~

2008-07-01T08:14:00.000-07:00

People Envy Your Compassion

You have a kind heart and an unusual empathy for all living creatures. You tend to absorb others' happiness and pain.

People envy your compassion, and more importantly, the connections it helps you build. And compassionate as you are, you feel for them.

What Do People Envy About You?

Upekka again

2008-07-01T07:34:00.001-07:00

Had wat tan hor at Upekka today. Claimed by many friends of mine to be DELICIOUS! But to my disappointment i couldn't find any feel in it. Another had a home made burger. May try it next time...

untitled

2008-07-01T07:13:00.000-07:00

A message to those...

Who speak behind my back. XXXX You. Well i don't really mind if you speak behind me but may at least USE UR LOGIC OF UNDERSTANDING. But then... do these people have logic at all?

Somehow it does hurt when you hear something that is not true. Who doesn't? And please to some people if you think you are one of them. Can you stop asking people things that are not of your concern? You are destroying lives and making people unhappy if you didn't know. Not mine but someone else that i cared. Which eventually affects me... and us...

Had a quarrel with someone when the real fault wasn't even us!

Sigh.

Myself?

2008-07-01T06:50:00.001-07:00

What Louis Wong Jau Yn Means

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life.

You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you.

At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.

You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.

And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.

You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.

You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.

You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts.

You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it.

You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator!

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life.

You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone.

Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs.

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.

You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.

You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.

You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.

You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Selfish?

2008-07-01T06:47:00.000-07:00

You Are 34% Selfish

In general, you are a very giving person who treats others very well.

But at times, you insist on getting your way - when it matters most to you.

How Selfish Are You?

Let those people decide...

flowers...?

2008-07-01T06:45:00.000-07:00

What An Iris Says About You

You are incredibly hopeful and courageous.

Even when you've been challenged in life, you have faith that everything will work out.

Your feelings run deep, and you are a very grateful person.

What Do The Flowers You Pick Say About You?

Yes, i have faith... especially towards someone... but does she have them for me? :(

Big Apple

2008-06-30T07:08:00.000-07:00

Su Lin Jie treated us Big Apple last night. It was delicious. Liked coffee, mango and the one with peanut fillings inside. :) Lovely. Just made a photo frame card for my dear friends too. :)

charity

2008-06-28T07:31:00.000-07:00

I went for a voluntary work today at Sentosa carpark there. Helping out for an event tonight. It was about this school that had been unfairly closed and for 8 years they are fighting to re open the school. 30 students were left and they are forced to study in a temple. Yup. it was a temple. Studying by Gods side. Haha. It was hard work. Went home early. body was in pain here and there. OOOCH. I take it as an exercise there. :) At least its better than staying at home thinkin too much and playing dota. Do good is fun too.

Bon Odori. I'm coming

2008-06-26T06:58:00.000-07:00

Title : Bon Odori Festival 2008
Venue : Panasonic Sports Complex (formerly Matsushita Centre)
Lot 4, Persiaran Perkilangan, Seksyen 21
Shah Alam,Selangor
Date & Time : Sat 12 Jul 2008 (7pm onwards)
Tickets : Free Admission
Phone : 03-2274 2274 (Japan Club of KL)
Synopsis : The Bon Festival is a Japanese Buddhist custom which is held annually to honour the deceased spirits of one's ancestors. It is meant to be a joyful celebration, bringing families together, and celebrating rather than mourning the lives of the dearly departed.

The Bon Odori Festival has been a fixture here in Malaysia for the last 30 odd years, and is more a festival of Japanese culture, with Japanese dances - including the traditional Bon Odori, danced specially for this occassion - music, food and lots more, presented throughout the evening.

********************************************

Bon Odori. I missed you since last year. The great atmosphere you gave me, its coming again soon. Many thanks to Poh Yee who bring me there last year. This im going again no matter what. Even if i had to go alone again. Once a year journey. Maybe the only time im the most HIGH and Happy mood. XD

bully

2008-06-25T04:57:00.000-07:00

the issue of bully was brought up when one asked me why am i so serious... and later she ask "are you timid" then?

................................................................

Sigh.

Well how to you expect a victim to speak up? whats more with threats??? Im only primary then and owez kena bully and .. and... how do you expect a child like that to speak up??

"will you take revenge?"

revenge? i don't mind if that person i hate dir in front of me and ask for help. I think i may laugh with a icy cold heart. call me heartless. But do you think what the bully had done to me is light? the consequence of the me now. the trauma i CANNOT FORGET. the fucking fear that i had that made what am i now. DO YOU THINK I CAN FORGET JUST LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NO.

But i can put aside those memories...

I wont take revenge... cos wont i just be like him? revenge is a waste of time. hurting urself more and engulfed in this sorta hate. not worth at all.

GARY OYAU BREK

If i get the name right. I hope you get what you deserve for making what i am to be now.

They say Hating is a painful feeling. indeed it is.

Zzz

2008-06-25T04:08:00.000-07:00

Just wake up from my nap. A long one and i felt better now after that sorrowful trauma switch. T_T behave much juz like dororo. T_T . My neck is kinda ooch now. I cant turn left. T___T. off to cook my dinner now...

what's wrong

2008-06-25T01:01:00.000-07:00

It was wednesday today. It just rained outside lightly. I remember once someone said that when it rains, its a good thing. Not sure bout that but i don't see anything well today.

I wonder what happened today. I don't really felt good. It was painful day that i don't understand and soon all pains that im trying to forget came back bullying me again. T_T. I shared my feelings to a dear friend and i didn't know she did came for me. Felt guilty for making her stood there and wait. It was when i decided that i want to talk she walked away. Worse is i somehow .... just make things worse. Spoiled her day i guess. Anyway im suffering now whilst typing this blog. Hate this feeling.

Felt really useless that why i must behave this way. Is it because the pain that once tore me is too immense? Was in small tears again today. Is it the environment?? what i see and so the things just trigger?

What is it? Guilt, fear, anger or what? No one wants to be unhappy. I'm trying to be open-minded... im trying my best to smile but trying seems to be a failure. Indeed things had changed. To remind of the so called "happy" past makes me hurt. I do know that what must be done and had to be done. i have someone to support me to heal n take time. but how long must it take? it seems that certain things are too "evil" to forget off.

Still i pained once in a while. Even the laughter and smiles seem to be a pain. Why? Cos sometimes i felt like an accidently slaughtered goat and revived back without saying sorry! There some parts maybe i deserve a slap but things have gone too far at certain points in life.

How many ass would take the guts to speak up and face terrors? I did the impossible. The idiocy. People walking around as if they never do wrong, thinking they are INNOCENT. WTF. Whats more is this quote that i remember n i detest a lot. " can't believe that in this world got this kind of people"

WTF. WHO ARE YOU??? WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE??? Having ask that question? Why am i to be sad that i must go though this miserable suffering when it was just some bitch that said it???

Lots of things went to my mind. Hate it a lot. How much longer need i suffer to get rid of it????

******************************
Again i am to face some things in the future. Some facts that i hope i can accept without pains. It is painful indeed but i hope it will change.

Gluttony strikes again - Kelana Jaya...

2008-06-23T03:40:00.000-07:00

Had BBQ steamboat on sat night somewhere at Kelana Jaya there. Forgot the name of the place. Telephone something. Good thing bout that place is that there is A LOT OF MEAT. while the turn down was the tables are awfully small. The meal was okay where u can actually had bbq there. Gosh after that night i had sore throat and later flu and fever...its the THIRD DAY now that im ill. T_T. Luckily didn't puke that night. Got a bit of control but i certainly was bloated. XD

Just got home....

2008-06-20T01:26:00.000-07:00

Just got home from uni. Almost rained and luckily i got home on time. No one is home... sigh. bored. Next week i got lotsa assignments to hand in. Hope i can finish in due time. Well i will. My yogur berry 30% discount is going to expire... :( still not been there yet...Aie...

Feelings were weird though things have been fine. Gotta stay strong.

Untitled

2008-06-18T07:09:00.000-07:00

So much. Happy, sad and angry. First and foremost was bout one of my godsis. Was very happy den when she gave birth to a babygirl whom share the same b'day as me. I read her blog also felt happy with watery eyes :). I don't understand but it sure feels special somehow and its a new born, daughter of one of my first penpal n godsis. Shit happens and i don't know what happen lately to Chloe. T___T Just sad if it happens. I do understand how she felt to some extents. I hope i really can do something to help or save her... :(

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Felt awkward today when people ask "Eh why are you not....."
=_= how the hell i was suppose to know?
hurts man. *first blood*

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Was happy that night too. I dun understand why i still panic and got "stuck". 6months and i still stammer when saying those things. >< Well at least i did it. Tho i was a bit disappointed, but i too was happy the other way round. ^^

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Yeap. It's a big decision to make. It really flares when i think about it that money is a big deal to my family. It's such a itch when you have nothing much in life and you can't do the things you wanted. And i just don't know why i had to be in this state where i'm not at least financially stable. I can't blame my parents cos thy've been working hard.....i.... just don't know wht to do. It's utterly quite HARD and DIFFICULT to achieve my ultimate dream. Sacrifices needed. To leave one it wud break my heart severely, to leave the other i would be the most ungrateful soul on earth. There is no compromise :( i just pray and hope that somewhere along this few years a change or miracle will happen.

Dear God i had enough pain, sufferings, struggles. Do yo still think that it is not enough????

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm 22 now. A new life to start but no spices in me. sometimes i wonder why am i so willingful to do so much without getting a blessing. haha... silly indeed...

shapes

2008-06-18T05:11:00.001-07:00

_____xxxxxxx___________xxxxxx
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________xx
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_________xxxxxxx
________xxxxxx........FrIeNdShIp
_______xxxxx.......Is Like A Flower;
_____xxxxx........Growing In Its Glory,
___xxxxx...........Telling its own story;
__xxx.............FrIeNdShIp is Precious,
__xx..................Not Only In Shade,
__ x............But In D Sunshine Of Life.
....Thanks For Being My Fren...
May Our FrIeNdShiP Will Everlasting
GoD bLeSs In EvRyTiN u Do...

Complicated feelings.

2008-06-17T01:08:00.000-07:00

Yup. Just complicated. Neiter sad nor happy. Just wondering...

*updates*

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Murni

2008-06-16T07:03:00.000-07:00

Again i had my feast at Murni nights ago. Had this SUPER HUGE Mee Raja. Live up to it's name and it's really HUGE. I also had this special dragon fruit drink. Two hit combo. T__T thats so sinful.

Chow Yang

2008-06-16T06:50:00.000-07:00

Was at Chow Yang pasar malam last thursday night. I had this asam laksa which kills. I sweated like i just jump into the swimming pool. The taste is simply stinging. Never will i touch them anymore. Then i also had this Yip Chee Mei Bun which again i will never touch it. Why? Cos its so huge and my . Next i also had this yu yu ice. some ice blended fruity thingy. I also had this satay flavoured fishball. Nothing special. The fishballs are small and not as good as those that i've eaten in Sarawak and Brunei. So that's what i had that night ^^

Old Town White Coffee

2008-06-11T07:35:00.000-07:00

It was my first time there. Originally intended to buy myself a slice of cake from secret recipe but the atm is empty so i walked away. Bumped in the guys at old town and well... had my first coffee there. Iced White coffee from rm3.80 with small glass. T_T Think my pee can even fill the glass but of course... ahem. Rest of em had some bites. ^^

drools ~

2008-06-11T07:26:00.000-07:00

It's kinda sleepy day today for it is the first time i slept in class >< Muz have been to tired i guess. It was a terror too where everyone said that there will be a water cut off from 3 till tomorrow. AHHHHH. But luckily my area prob had it done at night cos i didn't have water supply in the mornings. Had my breakfast at the kopitiam at 17 there. The wantan mee not bad le. XD I must say it's delicious cos i had not eaten one decent one in KL yet. Or have i? My lunch was sandwich. Cucumbers, tuna, fried eggs with onion springs. :P~

Another day gone by...

2008-06-10T06:21:00.000-07:00

I'm going to sleep early tonight. No reasons. Maybe just want to adopt a healthy lifestyle. Rest well and be well. Last night i was at True Fitness. It was an awful night. Well found out that im overweight. And it turns that i do not need to lose weight but i need to lose FAT. F-A-T. God knows how my tummy looks like. A blob. I tot of snapping a pic of my tummy n post it here... but then. I think no one would visit this blog again if they saw that monster. That "tayar" as my housemate said. T_T.

I saw a glitter graphic from a frens friendster. In life we need certain things to survive. Food, water, air... friends.* rolls my brain* add love too.

Think i may go vegetarian lately. For a short term till i get my shape back. had my hair cut last weekend too. waited an hour. den i got the same hair stylist. her skirt is short and wow.XD

Academics. The pain not started yet. But i had my impromptu speech graded. Responsibility. That word so suits my position. =_= srt of flunk it when i stuck halfway. T_T 2 MINUTES ONLY!!!

Signing off now. Rather tired today...

Zzzzz
Nothing new in life. Been trying to be happy and strong. ^^

Out with Fish

2008-06-06T21:38:00.000-07:00

Had a tiring day yesterday. My old friend from miri, previously a classmate in primary three. Met up in KL sen and went "adventuring" to Dataran Sogo and Midvalley. Haha. It was really a hot and killing day for my legs havin had the pains for the past two days. But worth it to see an old friend. Last i saw her was in miri in my secondary years i think and yesterday once more. People do change a lot they say but her teeth does not oops. :x That's d part of memory in m brain that i remembered. haha. Got treated with Baskin Robbins and a share of her Carl's Junior. The Japeloni something? >< Thank ya Fish.

Thanks 2

2008-06-06T21:22:00.000-07:00

Again I owe my thanks to those who gave me a belated surprise. My classmates who gave me my first cake.First birthday cake from a friend. I never had any since my form years. My dad often said that all our birthday's fall on the time out family are going through a crisis. Thanks to my housemates for the coffeebean and Jack Daniels choc and my classmates for the wallet and card. ^^

Thanks

2008-06-02T22:00:00.000-07:00

Upthere was a collection of wishes from my friends. I thank you all ^^

I thank those who smsed me as well, called up and one who sang for me on the phone :')

I thank Victor, Cindy, Yu Hua and Vianna for the surprise they gave me. It was my first birthday cake ^^ First time celebrating with a small number of friends. ^^

Thanks Siau Koon for the b'day gift also. Mister potato XD its d only one i get this year ^^

Happy and God knows how many times i teared.

:)

2nd of June.22 years of life.

2008-06-01T08:27:00.000-07:00

Another year went by and now im 22 years old. So much to say, so much to think. It's a long journey that i have made and finally adulthood. How much have a accompalish? How much have i failed and defeated? How good or bad have i been? It's debatable and what i claim myself may not be what other people think but does it matter? A mixture of feelings floats around these days until today. Tonight. The last year when i was 21. Since then, i can say its the beginning of problems and...i must say i have been very unhappy most of the time.

How have i been? A lot of changes takes place during the past one year. Emotional and well... just the way i have been on and off. Been trying my best at that age but i seem to flunk a lot of things. It was probably a hard year with the blade cutting through my heart almost everyday. A lot of unfairness too and well... maybe life just isn't for everyone. I have... to some extent improve myself but other aspects destroyed myself too.

I guess one of the changes that occured to me was family values. I used to get away as far as possible from them but now.. time changed how people behave. Family had become an important asset to me and i do hope that i have a chance to pay them back lavishly. I hoped to save enough money to bring them to travel and eat good food. My family.. had been in a poor state for 11 years. Hard life i go true and its true to say that no one would understand how bad it is. Earn a day, live a day. Being the eldest, my role will come soon. Though i've lived through a hard life where i guess i dun even have a teen or childhood life. I don't really blame that but am proud. Although some traumatic experience made the unhappy me of what i am now.

Maturity comes a long when we had bad experiences and troubles. It's hard to measure how mature we've become because different people just view it differently. I had my mature n imature times. Just behave differently to different time.

Love and relationships? I think i have been a failure in one circle and now i don't think i have a circle now. Do i really have friends? I do have some but the feelings is...maybe i just expect too much. I envy , i am jealous at times but i have to constantly remind myself some things. It's just a different world i am living in. Love story... well. i can only give a tear and smile for it. :) Friendship. Just let things go by. Afterall....maybe life isn't for everyone

But along the way when im down. I do manage to have some virtual friends that.. maybe made me happy. I don't i really am but... it's better than nothing. However.... well im quite contradicting...

How bad have i been? God knows and i do know i deserved to be punished.

the 22nd year of my life is approaching. There is just so much that i want and need. Expect and reject. Hard to be satisfied i guess. HUman nature.I don't have anything so i think i have the right to chase what i want? Sounds a bit selfish or mean tho. I just want to be happy and i didn't even harm anyone. :(

Like the many years i went through. I hope some things and change things. I hope i can forget. Cos i just remember too much. the unhappiness and hatred and anger. So many things in my heart. I wish i can let go one by one. ANother thing i hope is happiness. To be better than everyone and most importantly myself. Other wishes are just hard to get. Use to believe a sincere heart gets a good blessing but....

Guess today is just another normal day to go by. ^^ Like yesterday and today and tomorrow. It's hardly been a special and memorable time. Just live and wish ^^.I don't know.*shrugs* I just hope i can be happy and not disappoint and let down myself.

Louis Louis Louis. 22. your 22!!!! And ...

I felt like crying now. T_T

2008-06-01T00:23:00.001-07:00

'Don't punish yourself with others' mistakes'

i got this quote from blog i read. It's true. And i hate it when i realize it. Cos i think that's what i always did. Punishing myself for mistakes that i didn't make. What a fool i am. And just when we started to defend. People will say "he's just defending himself" =_=

I always take blames and stuff that weren't mine. Why am i like that???

good morning nightmare

2008-05-31T19:55:00.000-07:00

My heart physically hurts now.EEEE. Dun know why.

*********************************************

3am this morning. I smsed "her" to tell her something.Haha. But no service available so dear friend if you read this.... >< you know im talking about you lo. Not that i don't or can't sleep. Well i had a nightmare of someone. And it leaves me awake with a heavy heart T_T

Just that

2008-05-30T21:51:00.000-07:00

I realized i can't do what i said. Funny that my heart, brain and hands work separately. emotions, logic and desire. >< Haha... Louis ..

blogs blogs blogs

2008-05-30T06:09:00.000-07:00

I love blogging. Blog out every moment i have, i can. I read em too. Below are my regulars. XD

http://food-hungry.blogspot.com/

This belongs to Jestina. My fav one and why? Cos it's all about eating out in Brunei. Having to stay in Brunei for so long. I truely must say that i rarely go out to eat. Even hang out with friends or so cos... well parents. most classy i been to is Empire Hotel there to have international class food. Others just had festival dinner at grandma's home. Love her blog cos she just opened up my eyes that how special the food in brunei can be... In some sense la.

http://joreenaintcrazy.blogspot.com/

This belongs to Joreen. My godsis in spore. Sweet girl and her blog makes me really envious in some sense. Love to read her life progress ^^ Hope shes happy and will give birth smoothly.

http://storyofmeandyou.blogspot.com/

Ka-tip. Since i first saw him shave his head in Lower six Lit class and nicked named "syaitan" by Mr Jones. haha. I must say he got the sexist bald head around. He looks better without his hair growing you know. Ahem bout his blog... he didn't update regularly but it's still fun to read.

http://santo-diablo.blogspot.com/

Alexander Wira Pori. Did i get his name right? >< He just blogged not long ago and well i love what he posts. Esp those pictures XD

http://thegnoel.blogspot.com/ and http://wackychineseboy.blogspot.com/

Kwan Wee Leong and Wong Kuan Lee. Did i get their name right? First two st. andrews to invade SMMG when i was in form 4. Knew met in pri one and leong since then. Leongs blog was a laugh and he taught me a lot. Haha. Metis one is neat and his skills in photography are... grrr.. im jealous. Haha..

What's next?

2008-05-30T05:08:00.000-07:00

A few of my friends ask me what i am going to do after i graduate. Go back Brunei, stay or somewhere else. Well personally i am not really sure yet cos there are a lot of factors that influence my move. Money, family, love, self-interest and performance.

Though the future is unpredictable regardless of what decisions we made. Well at least i planned how things MAY be then. . .

1) After graduate. Go back Brunei to work. Thats what i thought when i first came here. Money is good and in 6 months i can buy a lot of things XD. in 2 years. I would travel to somewhere far...

2)Stay in KL for 2 years then go back Brunei. Then my pay will be higher. Muahaha.

3)Depends if i got a gf or not and if she is willing to go back to Brunei with me. To be decided in the future. Haha...

4) Depends if a miracle ( kena jackpot ) happen to my family. If im still single. I'll go to S.Korea and teach.

5)If kena jackpot... i'll travel around and help people. ^^ Bring my baby around.

6)Stay in Malaysia for life. I may if circumstances allow...

Like i said. It's unpredictable. At least i planned for my future ^^